tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8830933917349183001.post6110619600411669306..comments2023-09-15T05:24:29.125-07:00Comments on What lies within: Becoming visible.....nobody is going to do this but me....Margaret Dempseyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17385395565359693331noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8830933917349183001.post-49884463259063864382009-04-06T22:36:00.000-07:002009-04-06T22:36:00.000-07:00Harry, thank you so much for your considered, comp...Harry, thank you so much for your considered, compassionate and well thought out comment. There are so many similarities in our experiences of this path and both of us are grappling with many of the same things. This is inspiring and encouraging for me. <BR/><BR/>Thank you for your advice for me to be gentle on myself. That sentence really moved me and brought tears to my eyes. I realise that I put myself under a lot of unnecessary pressure not to let any opportunity go where I can inspire others to find the spiritual power for themselves. Of course there are only so many hours of the day and my day starts at 5am.<BR/><BR/>The world is shifting at such a rapid rate and the test in all of this is to stay steady and keep our nerve. I believe that things are going to speed up to the point that people are not going to have any choice but to go inside to discover the rich inner life. Things external are going to become so uncertain and unreliable and this is going to create the shift. <BR/><BR/>It is like the universe has taken a breath in with everything that is happening and we are now waiting for the outward breath. In that breath the consciousness of humanity will shift to its new axis and those qualities you say have alluded you will become who and what you are. You are that, simply by your desire to want to make a difference and be transformative. <BR/><BR/>I am in awe of the power of the experiences you have had and I really get how unsettled they have been for you. But when the shift comes...you will find all of those experiences coming together and you won't recognise what you will do and the difference you will make.<BR/><BR/>So hang in there, small steps to realising your dream is the way to do it.<BR/><BR/>I can't say how much your comments mean to me and how privileged I feel that you continue to read this blog.Margaret Dempseyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17385395565359693331noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8830933917349183001.post-23501215820040075562009-04-06T10:21:00.000-07:002009-04-06T10:21:00.000-07:00Hello MargaretI fought with this same problem for ...Hello Margaret<BR/><BR/>I fought with this same problem for years. After I received shaktipat I lost all interest in normal day to day life & work for a while. I quit a good job & started spending most days sitting on Clapham common reading spiritual books & just thinking & observing life going on around me. After a while I felt as if I had become sort of invisible to other people. I started imagining myself as a sort of Buddha, just sitting still & smiling at my creation as it unfolded around me. I tried to create the feeling that I was creating this world around me on a moment to moment basis & yet without effort or memory it was only spontaneous creation, & free. I supplied the energy for this but the world around me & everyone in it had the freedom to create also. It was ok for a while.<BR/><BR/>I think I got the idea for this strange mindset a few days after my shaktipat experience. I was sitting in a car on Balham Hill, waiting for a friend who had popped into a shop to get something. The car radio was playing & the traffic around me was heavy & roadworks were going on with road drills hammering away. My immediate feeling was “hurry up Michelle, lets get the hell out of here”. Then suddenly a shift occurred within me, totally spontaneously I started experiencing all of this as emanating from within inside of me. It was real. I hadn't taken any drugs. It felt as though this connection was happening within my body & I was creating all this. The music coming out of the car radio, the people, the noise, the traffic all of it was my creation & I could feel the energy that was supplying this drama somehow flowing from within me & back again. I understood why so many of these archetypal gurus & spiritual masters were often depicted as laughing, because it was a blissful experience. It made me laugh.<BR/><BR/>Later, feet planted firmly back on the ground, I resolved that I would find a way to share this experience. I wanted it to be experiential though, not just written like this. I started trying to think of ways to create this experience for others & realised I couldn't. I signed up for all sorts of workshops & courses, hoping I would find some tool or technique I could use in my own embryonic course ideas. The problem with this is that I set myself up with an impossible task. The sort of technique I was after would have been available to people like Jesus, Buddha, Shiva or any genuine guru, but not me.<BR/><BR/>The trainings like Est, The Forum, & The Life Training were all part of this searching for me. I studied 'Patanjali's Yoga Sutra's' looking for techniques & Siddhi's that could help me, but realised that these techniques were for adepts with years, if not lifetimes of training & discipline & probably very dangerous in my hands. The one time I started trying to practice a technique of Sanyama from this book I had a very frightening experience & stopped there & then. I realised you could open up a door to other worlds, but what I saw scared me & the beings through that door did not look as though they would do me any favours. Maybe all of this was some aspect of my shadow self, I just don't know, but I realised I needed to start clearing some of this stuff, that was perhaps lurking in my sub-conscious mind before proceeding. I became a rebirther which held some interesting possibilities & I am still interested in this now. I was also going to write books but felt always as if something was missing. I didn't want to be a charlatan I wanted to be the real thing in the transformation business. Later I thought maybe I could become a therapist of some kind, but I realised I had a lot of anger issues myself.<BR/><BR/>I think you are doing the right thing at this moment in your life. You are taking action & you have goals. Communication is the thing that can reach people & influence them. Your blog for instance is transformative & inspirational. These days it's much easier to reach out to the world with the internet & share idea's with blogs & websites. Publishing is easier also, Photoshop, Quark etc make it possible to publish professionally. Powerpoint for presentations at talks. Your journalism course is a great discipline for you & later you will hone your writing skills. Take it one step at a time. I am sure you will succeed with your plans. The main thing is to keep real. Don't set yourself an impossible curriculum, and don't beat yourself up over missing a few blog entries. Think about the amazing things you have achieved in your life so far, published a book, maintain a blog, maintain your coursework & your team management and leadership commitments. Be gentle on yourself because you are already doing a lot. I share with you your dream of making a difference, of being a transformer, of achieving enlightenment & freedom. I often think though about something that Babaji used to say 'Truth, Simplicity & Love', all three of these things seem to have alluded me.<BR/><BR/>All the best for now<BR/><BR/>HarryHarrynoreply@blogger.com