I haven't written this blog for a while because I have been trying to sort out what my life is about and where I am going. I have seven dates booked at the new centre - Deep Connection which I am really excited about. The first evening is November 4th when the centre opens. The evening is going to be run jointly by the owner and myself and I will be able to see from this how much interest there is in my course on the three stages to spiritual awakening and ultimately enlightenment.
There is a lot of interest in the centre. One woman is charging £125 for a course which promises that at the end each person attending will have dissolved all their karma. I couldn't believe it when I read the promotional material. Given what I know I have no idea how this lady could make such a bold claim. More amazing to me is that there are people out there who will pay this kind of money for such a claim and believe it. The frustrating thing for me is that I know without any doubt that NOW is the portal to spiritual awakening but I do not know how to access that portal for others. The concentration of the consciousness at a point in the present creates the access portal NOW which acts as a kind of vortex through which the energy of awakening rises. This is as clear to me as the fingers on my hand but how do I get this across to others in a way which is meaningful and inspires others to commit themselves to accessing this portal. No-one can do it for another, it is the journey by the alone to the alone.
This morning I received a friend request from facebook. I didn't recognise the person but he sent me a message saying that he has just finished reading my book and seemed to query whether my story was an honest account of the experiences. I had to read the message a couple of times before I could take in the implication. The implication I saw was that he didn't think the account of my spiritual awakening was honest. It's almost laughable given how much integrity plays on the spiritual path that I could write something that wasn't 100% honest. I know the cost of what being less than 100% authentic on this path brings. To go the whole way on this path requires nothing less than 100% honesty and authenticity. Even with the amazing experiences I have had and the way that life flows and is in harmony I still struggle on a daily basis. I struggle with what to do with all this knowledge and experience, how to package it in a way which will move and inspire people. I struggle with bringing my consciousness into daily life, it would much rather be somewhere else. I struggle with the frustration of knowing that the portal of NOW is the access to awakening and not knowing how to give others the key to access this portal.
I accessed this portal through a moment of deep shame on a meditation retreat. Eckhart Tolle accessed this portal through having a thought which shocked the mind so that the access to the portal became available. I had no idea it was going to happen and I'm sure he didn't either. Eckhart speaks about NOW in his book the Power of Now but the power is not so much the NOW but the portal it opens up. Is it simply enough to let people know that this portal is real and so worth going in search of or is it something I should simply forget. Once the portal of NOW opens up life is never the same. So in that way great care should be taken It's a bit like taking the genie out of the bottle, it can never be put back. I think it was Ghandi that said 'do not approach the spiritual path if you are afraid'. When I started I had no idea the path held the experiences that it does but the demand for these experiences is the complete surrender and lack of control for anything to do with 'I'. The deal as I see it, is these experiences in return for being a vehicle for something.....as I write this I do not yet know what....
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2 comments:
Harry
I was also very interested in your “How to access......the portal of NOW....” posting (for obvious reasons) because I have experienced similar things to you. The person on fb who questioned the authenticity of your awakening experience is clearly sceptical because of the seemingly far fetched descriptions that accompany Kundalini awakenings. I can understand others scepticism, because I'm not sure I would have believed it if it hadn't happened to me.
Anyone reading my 'Opening The Heart' posting or my earlier account of my own 'Shaktipat/Kundalini awakening' both on your own blog would also probably doubt the authenticity of my experiences. I can assure any readers, however that they were real & I have no reason to doubt Margaret's accounts of her own awakening. Once it happens you know it has happened & that's that. It does not really matter if anyone else believes you or not. I too wanted to be able to share this with others. It seems to me to be the single most important thing in our evolution as human beings. If I could find a way of duplicating my experience, or better still creating the space for others to experience their own unique Kundalini awakening I surely would.
There are people, 'True guru's' or 'Sat gurus' who can facilitate this. Finding a Sat or true guru isn't always that easy though, they tend to find you. For me my Sat guru was within me all the time, my own inner self in fact. When people talk about surrender to the guru, it brings up resistance. In my case I bowed to myself & surrendered to that which I already was. This was still difficult, but with the grace of the guru (within) all is possible. When all else fails simply sit quietly & ask for guidance, ask your inner guru to give you a sign or assistance. Amazing things can happen, remember we have free will, often the inner self/guru will not act unless a request is made. This is one way of burning up masses of karma & it does not cost £125.00.
Finally while we are on the subject of guru's Transcendental Meditation is very interesting actually. I took an TM course years ago. I remember going to this house in Balham, London with my piece of fruit, clean white handkerchief & flower. I was shown into a room with a puja (small alter) & the facilitator placed the fruit flowers & handkerchief on the puja, which had a photograph of Gurudev (Mahareshi's guru) on.
I sat on the floor, closed my eyes & the facilitator started chanting & during the chant the facilitator imparted my mantra to me. I floated around in a state of bliss for about 2 weeks after this & then all the marvellous feelings just went as quickly as they came. I acknowledged though that this was as a result of my own mind & not any defect in TM. I still use my TM mantra for meditating & do think TM is a valuable tool for learning to meditate easily. Even as a way of reducing stress in a hectic modern world meditation is very useful.
Greetings (and because of the eastern theme) Namaste to you all.
Harry
Hi Harry
It's always great to read your comments and we seem to be on the same wavelength when it comes to spiritual awakening and the place of kundalini in spiritual awakening. I forget that to those reading my book I am unknown and so perhaps some the experiences I have written about may be seen as difficult to accept as true.
I think the record of the experiences both yours and mine is a challenge to those who see the path as a way of making easy money from gullible people. The possibility that these experiences are real and possible may be a threat to those who are not serious about what this path can produce.
I think that there would be a lot less people claiming what they are claiming if they experienced the rising of the kundalini. IN that way, those who practice and make claims may become more authentic. I get irritated when I read some of the irresponsible promises made by some teachers but as you say, without the key to give people the experience of a kundalini rising there is little that we can do.
Thanks for what you wrote about TM meditation. Having finished Maharishi's book once I am now re-reading it because it makes such a lot of sense to me.
Keep calm and keep carrying on
All the best
Margaret
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