Monday, 28 April 2008

I am going to rename the spiritual path......the path of the miraculous

The title of this blog entry is exactly the way I feel this morning. I returned to London following a weekend with my family and the relaxed and connected way I felt before I went home remained with me for the entire time I was at home. I had an ease and a grace that I never had before. As a result everything flowed and was in harmony. I am clear that this is the fruit of following a spiritual path. The tool I have used to achieve it is the technology that is provided by Landmark education. Before I went home I created the possibility of everything being whole complete and perfect the way it was, there was going to be no need for me to fix or change anything. Yes, the usual tension that I feel when I go home was there but for the first time it had no effect on me. It had no effect because of the power of the possibility I had put in place that everything was whole, complete and perfect and needed no interference from me. As a result I was completely relaxed and everything flowed.

I must confess though I had said in my last blog entry that the spiritual path demands that there is no conflict between what one feels and what one says. Over the weekend I didn't carry that out in that I felt tension but didn't say anything. But this didn't seem to matter to the way everything flowed and was in harmony. I know that my parents saw the transformation and my relationship with my mum was more straight and honest and in that process I felt so much closer to her. Since seeing that the strategy I put in place to belong when I was younger was to be generous and giving that up in order to be straight, I have found that life works in a way I never thought possible.

There is a delicate balance to strike between being straight and making someone wrong. I wasn't sure that I could get that balance right over the weekend and so I wasn't as straight as I could have been with certain members of my family. Being straight while also not making someone wrong takes vigilance. The person will always feel if they are being made wrong while I am pretending to be straight and as a result the communication will not be effective. To make something wrong is to deny the intrinsic perfection of the universe that everything and everyone is whole, complete and perfect. I believe that it is possible to be straight, to keep in tune with this given and not make someone wrong but it takes work and I am only too well aware that I am not there yet. This is why I sold out on myself a little at home this weekend. I am also taking 100% responsibility for being at the source of this tension. There is something in the way I am being that is causing this. I'm not looking to fix or change it, I'm taking full responsibility for it.

But words cannot describe the comfort I felt amidst the tension. I was relaxed and happy. I had no preference for who I would speak to or who would speak with me. I felt no need to rush anywhere. This is why I am renaming the spiritual path, the path of the miraculous. I feel such a connection to people it's like there is truly no separation between me and them. Returning to London last night I was so happy and thankful to that force whether it is my own higher consciousness or something else that enabled the weekend to be the way that it was. I was so engrossed in my own euphoria that I left my case behind in a shop.

Then I had a rude awakening to reality when I realised it just before getting on the train to London. I raced back to the shop where it was sitting patiently. I tried to rescue it without anyone noticing but no such luck. This man said disbelievingly 'you didn't leave it'. I was embarassed and didn't say anything only picked it up and raced once more to the train. I am aware that I have to be vigilant about this. It is so easy when you sense another dimension, something else that is possible to lose grounding. I can see that it is something that can easily happen to me. I lose my mindfulness, my consciousness goes somewhere else and then the normal, everyday things of life get neglected. I don't think this is what the spiritual path is about. It is about bringing the spiritual into the normal. I can understand the temptation that the mystics felt to withdraw into the richness of their own consciousness. I have had glimpses and just occasionally like yesterday when I know how great a difference having the spiritual path is making in my life my consciousness can easily go somewhere else. But in the main I am grounded and I have my job to thank for that.

I know what the weekend would have been like if I didn't have the tools that I have been given. These tools are accelerating my spiritual path......I am clear about that. This morning I woke up early and still on a high from the way my weekend was I sat on my stool to meditate. I have found that if I visualise the sky in my mind then this represents for me the space of nothingness where the consciousness has to abide if it is to be calm. Thoughts are represented by clouds. I try now to rest in the sky and then as thoughts come I see them as clouds. In the beginning of meditation there only seems to be clouds. Then gradually a glimmer of blue comes through. This is the first glimpse of stillness and something 'other'. Continuous mindfulness will also deepen this. I think the mystic state is one where the consciousness rests in the blue tranquil sky and there isn't a cloud to be seen. I think that this refers to the state of samadhi or nothingness......

No comments: