There are days like this.....

Gosh am I pleased that today is over. Somedays are worse for me at work than others and today was one of those days. My team had to do a presentation and each of us had to give a 4 minute presentation. Now I am a competent communicator as identified when you have completed 10 speeches from the toastmasters manual and have been evaluated on those speeches. Given this you would think that I would give a chic polished performance - not a bit of it. All I could hear was my voice shaking. Anyway, got through it and sat down, then it was the turn of the others.

My mind had a field-day with thoughts like 'he'/she is better than you, did more preparation, has a nicer voice...and on and on and on.......In these kind of situations it is a challenge to turn around the situation and learn something spiritually from it, but I did. I recognised that these were just thoughts and they are a product of the mind like sights are a product of seeing. I never analyse what I see or allow the things I see to make me feel bad but I allow my thoughts to do this. Why? They have the same truth as the things I see yet, I analyse and give importance and validity to my thoughts that I don't give to what I see with my eyes. In one way this is quite tragic and in another way it is funny.

I think I am also unsettled because it is almost the end of the day and I haven't had a telephone call from the meditation centre with a decision as to whether or not they will rent me the room to have the course. How difficult the theory is when faced with the reality. I have written how if I don't get this room that it will be alright but the truth is that I will be very disappointed....so now I wait. I will not call the manager back until tomorrow because he said that he would call me today.

This brings me to another point and that is the importance of keeping one's word. If you say you are going to do something then do it. This is not only good manners but it also gives confidence to the inner life that you do what you say you will do. Everytime I keep my word and have integrity which is doing what I say I will do when I say I will do it the inner assistance for the spiritual journey becomes stronger. At the beginning this level of integrity is difficult to maintain but with perseverence it will become a natural part of the character. I have been doing this for so long that now when I say I will be somewhere and it looks like I will be late something will happen and I will always arrive in time. It is like the universe trusts me when I say I will do something and works to make it happen for me. Living a life with integrity makes for a much simpler and more fulfilling life. Commit to something and see it through no matter how strong the temptation not to keep your word is. Integrity builds a foundation for power.