Monday, 27 April 2009

The new paradigm.....

I spent a lot of today looking at the large wall-mounted TV which is in the reception at college. Because of the din of the area my keeping up with events as they unfolded was through the sub-titles which were headed 'breaking news' and gave details of the confirmed case of swine flu in Europe, in this case Spain. In true British stoicism the issue was acknowledged by my colleagues as 'quite worrying' which gave me the platform to proclaim my mantra of staying steady. Yesterday I had an insight that the shift of consciousness is going to result in another kind of perception. I think it will be depth perception, whereby other realms and worlds which have been spoken and written about but are not available to the consciousness as it operates now will become available. The shift that is coming is going to result in greater perception so that things that couldn't be validated or verifed before will now will be. I can't be more specific than that and I have no evidence for this, it is an insight I had and like all of my insights I don't get the how for the way in which they are going to come about.

Today was a really good day in college. I feel that I am no longer drowning in the shorthand quicksand. I know though that this comfort is conditional on me putting in the required hour of work come what may. I see now that it for two chapters where I didn't put in the time is where my knowledge is a bit hazy which reflects when I have to write outlines that involve learning from these chapters. I'm beginning to see that all of shorthand is about how words sound not how they are spelled and if I can keep this distinction in my head and the relevant outlines then that should be my ticket to getting the speed I want to go for a job on either a newspaper or a magazine.

I was thrilled today when I received feedback from the lecturer for the second feature of the six I have to do for the exam portfolio. This was a write-up of the interview I did with the Managing Director of a chilled food manufacturer. I had kind of told myself that it didn't really fit the brief because it was another interview and not so much of an article so I couldn't believe it when on the front page I saw a large 'B' in black pen. This is the first 'B' I have got for an article I have done on this course. It was interesting getting the feedback from the lecturer compared to the feedback the editor of the magazine had given me. The editor had allowed wordy adjectives such as 'effective' 'essential', the college lecturer wanted them out. What I see now is that I can write simply and don't need to use these kind of words which is a huge relief. I can read something and then say 'what is this saying' and then write in my own words simply and clearly.

In spite of the rain sheeting against the window for most of the day today I had a contentment and ease and joy which is just so precious. I don't know what is causing this. I think it is that I am finally in integrity around what I want to do with my life. What will unfold is going to do so slowly because one can't a live a life where the integrity has been out for so many years and expect things to shift overnight, it doesn't happen like this.

I was a bit nervous driving home because I suddenly remembered that two people where I live have been sick with a stomach bug that is going around. The mind is funny, the moment I got in and heard the news that a third person and a friend weren't feeling well, I immediately thought I could feel a rumbling in my stomach. I made some green tea and chatted to one of the people there. We got talking about being held back in life from what we want to do and I spoke again about programmes which are effective in showing where the blind spots are in life. These blind spots hold us back by virtue of the fact that they are blind spots. She has had her work cut back to two days and is now in a position to look at what else might be possible. I invited her to come to hear about the Forum in a couple of weeks; this time I will keep my word and be there.

Even though I am finishing this training in May I will continue to be a stand not for this kind of training necessary although it is what I have found hugely powerful, but a stand for people to stop looking outside for answers that are within. To realize that power and freedom doesn't come from getting more, better and different of what is outside, but of becoming a friend and lover to what is within........

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