Friday, 20 February 2009

At the airport....going to Amsterdam..

I've just been so busy trying to get everything sorted out to go to Amsterdam today. Yesterday I went to collect my car from the garage. I had forgotten that I had a big desk in the boot which meant that I had no back seat space. This would have been fine if there was only going to be me travelling in it but one woman had said that she wouldn't have a car to travel to a seminar which the magazine was putting on. I totally forgot about the desk and in my usual 'how can I be of contribution here' said 'we can travel in my car'..thought of desk nowhere near my consciousness'. When did I think of the desk....yes you guessed it at about 11.30pm when I was just about to drop off to sleep. Aagh...sat bolt upright in bed...what was I going to do. I wouldn't have enough time to get my car, go back to the house, take out the desk and be in in time for work. To take the desk out 50 miles away would be ridiculous to have to go back down and collect it. Then I had a brainwave....I would request the garage to be a minder of the desk until Monday when I would come and collect it early. Delighted with my problem solving skills I coasted off to sleep. My final thought was a wistful thought about keeping the courtesy car because I was used to going on the long journey to my work placement.

I had one moment of temptation with the thought 'call them tomorrow and say that you can't come and collect your car'. But I immediately dismissed this, my car was ready to be collected and to do that would have been so out of integrity. So berating myself for being so no bending of da rules I went off to sleep. I woke up early and me and my trusty sat nav set off to the garage. I made my request for the desk to be kept and explained why and the man was must so lovely, 'that wasn't a problem'. Thrilled that my desk challenge had been resolved. I waited for the man to bring the keys to me. I waited....and waited.....and I saw a couple of huddled heads together. Eventually mindful of how much time I had allocated to getting my car I said that 'I really had to go and what was the problem'. The problem was that my car keys were proving elusive! The same man saw that I was desperate to get going and said 'look keep the courtesy car, no charge on either rent or insurance and return it to us on Monday'....reeesult....I just couldn't believe it. This is the result that I had secretly had hoped for.....or given the powerful distinctions I now use on a daily base......did I create it so that I would have the courtesy car for the final day of my work experience.

I set off with my heart singing with gratitude. The morning was very foggy and the combination of fog with the beauty of the rolling hills meant that I really had to focus to keep my consciousness on the road. I just wanted to stop and lose myself in the beauty of what I was absorbing. Blue skys are lovely but there is something about not being sure about whether or not certain shapes are there. It is somewhat illusory and my consciousness absolutely loved it. The rest of the day went well. I wrote an article on meditation for the magazine. I realise that it's not mind, body, spirit, more health and wellbeing so I was very careful to write it in a style that people who don't meditate or know very much about it would like. I was thinking about the kinds of things to include and when it came to types of meditation the first thought I had was 'write about walking meditation'. This was strange because it is sitting meditation that is most common. But as always and ever I will listen and act on these inner instructions so I wrote about the power of being aware every time the foot leaves the earth and returns to the earth. That first point of contact is powerful.

I finished the article and put it into the folder I was requested to. Later that morning the features editor said how she had read it and liked and was intending to do some articles and promotion on feet and walking and that it would tie in well!!! When she said this I felt like I was in some strange kind of zone. It is like now that I am finally in integrity and not selling my soul for a paycheck that the universe is bending over backwards to show me what is possible. Or is it that now my natural abilities to tune in and create the world I really want to have are not being constrained by anything. The truth is that I don't know. I do know that once we are true to ourselves that everything begins to work in ways that didn't seem possible. I have even had a play with an In design programme which given my dislike of spreadsheets and moving things around and making things fit, I should really hate. The truth is that I got really involved and interested with it.

I've been so busy with everything that my organisation to get to Amsterdam this morning was pathetic. I didn't have any directions with me to get to the hotel. I created that I would find somewhere with an Internet and get the directions with freedom and ease. What do I find here in Terminal 1 but a computer terminal operated by Zurich insurance which is wait for it........TOTALLY FREE! this day and age to get free internet access with the biggest most plushest computer I have ever used is just pure magic for me. I knew that I had been sent an attachment with the directions from the airport to the hotel so I went on my email. When it came to opening up the attachment I couldn't do it. I called the man over who managing this work area and explained what I wanted. Really I should have thought about the risk to the system of opening attachments so I understood when he explained why I couldn't open it. He then said 'let me see what I can do'. A couple of minutes later is back standing beside me with a couple of pages of handouts. On it are all the directions I need to get myself from the airport to the hotel. Like being left the courtesy car, I am just speechless. How is life so like this at the moment.

I've been looking at other blogs and at how other people write and this blog is more a diary. There isn't much analysis. To be honest by the time I've finished waxing lyrical about me there's more than enough written! I guess what I want to get across from this blog is the importance of courage how we sell out on ourselves and what the universe wants from us by staying in safe, secure jobs that we hate. But I am clear that I could never have done what I am doing if I hadn't had the breakthrough into how I had to control everything. Give that up and all of the energy that had been trapped in trying to control everything is freed up and it's freed up to create and create and create.......

I won't have access to the computer until Sunday night but I'm so excited about this weekend. It's my last quarter of this programme and what I have received from it, words don't do justice's gonna be a fun and exciting weekend.

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