Wednesday, 1 August 2007

It is in giving that we receive...

How clever is the mind. This morning my first thought was of my low heart rate and there was a desire to know what the resting heart rate was. This was interesting to look at and showed me just how easily it is to be tempted away from one's purpose. All of this was yesterday, why did the mind take it over to the next morning? It is because when it allows the space and stillness to connect with something else, its hold on the consciousness becomes weaker. This morning it won the game, but I won't beat myself up about it. It just shows me that really I haven't come that far when I think that I have.

Got up at 4.30am when the alarm went and got ready to go to the gym for my weekly spinning class. Here is where I do my most powerful meditation. Cycling on the bike I lose all awareness of where I am and what I am doing and I feel so good. This morning I found a box of chocolates in my flat which I hadn't scoffed (quite a feat for me) and I remembered that it was the day that the cleaner comes in. The urge to give them to her was really strong so I took them down, left her a note to say they were for her. When I did this I felt the most amazing fullness in my heart and throat and will thought how true it was that it is when we give that we receive. All I was giving her was some chocolates and what I received in return sustained and nourished me all day at work.

I had such a lovely day at work. Everything flowed and I was able to concentrate and the mind didn't give me so much trouble. I like it when the mind co-operates so that I can do work because then I feel I am in integrity and on the spiritual path integrity is so important. Being true to yourself and others is key to achieving enlightenment and today I felt that I had integrity in all I did.

I had a nice surprise when I went to collect my car from the garage. I had taken it to get its MOT and had been thinking that I would wash it because it's difficult to park the car in my street without being under trees with all the bird droppings that involves. When the woman gave me the keys she said it's by the car wash where we washed it for you. Words can't describe the deepest feeling of gratitude which welled up from deep within me and I felt quite overcome. Something totally unexpected. No money can buy this. Driving home I felt so happy.

I heard from the centre and they have agreed to allow me to rent their room for a one day workshop. Now the real work begins because my mind has already started its attack with thoughts like 'what can you teach', people go into shops and pay money and come out with a bag, what bag are people going to come away from your workshop with'. But I am going to push through this. I have had profound experiences which I believe need to be spoken about. I am getting messages from the universe that it is now the right time for me. I need to plan the day so that those who come and spend their well hard earned money that they do feel the expansion of consciousness which characterizes spiritual awakening.

It was a lovely day and to that force which made it possible, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

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